On New Years Eve Steph, Matt, Jonathan, and I went out for a nice sushi dinner. As dinner was being served Matt got a call from a neighbor. The neighbor said, "Molly is outside lying in our pond, I guess she was hot". The call, while amusing, was inconveniently timed as Matt had to rush home to bring a wet and dirty Molly home from the neighbor's house.
Both Molly and Cartman are serious contenders for Worst Dog of the Year but lest the trophy be awarded too quickly I would like to submit two other dogs for consideration. (One of the awards would be a posthumus award as one of the two nominees passed away earlier this year.)
Nominee #1 Rusty
Rusty is a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, arguably one of the cutest dogs in the world. His big bug eyes look at humans with love and affection. Rusty loves to snuggle and kiss his human pals. However, Rusty possesses some "quirks" which make him a contender for "Worst Dog of the Year"
1. He loves to eat cat poop. When visiting our house it is imperative that you look closely at Rusty's mouth before you let him kiss you! If you see a ring of a sand like substance around his mouth you should run screaming for the door because that is not sand. It's cat litter. Oh yes, that means he has just been foraging in his all-you-can-eat buffet also known as Nigel's cat box. It's so disturbing and nasty.
2. He pees in the house. Not all the time but any time there is inclement weather Rusty refuses to go outside and, instead, sneaks away to pee on a rug. Charming.
3. He farts a lot. See yesterday's post for more information. It's not pretty.
4. He snores more loudly than a lumberjack. Rusty used to keep us up every night with his unbelievably loud snoring. Then, one day, we invested in a dog crate and now he sleeps in a crate in another room. But we can still hear him snore. It's just not as loud. We are thinking of making him sleep even further away...somewhere like Oklahoma comes to mind.
Nominee #2 Gabriel
The first thing I have to say about Gabriel is: may he rest in peace. Gabriel, my beautiful Samoyed, passed away this September and we all miss him terribly. With that said, I think that Gabe should also be considered for the Lifetime Achievement Award: Worst Dog of the Year.
1. Gabriel had severe stomach and overall health problems. Gabe was not blessed with good health and his gastrointestinal problems were legendary. One issue related to his stomach problems was that he couldn't eat any processed food so we had to cook for him every day. As he got older the problems got worse so we, at our vet's suggestion, added canned pumpkin to his diet to minimize the diarrhea. This made his poop kind of an electric orange color.
2. Pooped in the house a lot. As Gabe got older he pooped in the house several times every night. And since his poop was electric orange in color it stained the rugs in a very unusual and awful way.
3. Peed in the house a lot. Gabe was sneaky and would often pee on area rugs that were dark in color so we didn't even realize he had peed until we walked on the rug. Gross. When he passed away we threw away two rugs because that smell was never coming out.
4. Gabe was mean to our good dog, Kodiak. Gabe always tried to bite Kodiak but fortunately Gabe wasn't too ambulatory by the time we got Kodi so he couldn't do much damage.
5. Gabe was stubborn and spoiled. Gabe refused to do anything he didn't want to do. Enough said.
I feel better now that I have made my nominations. I think that Molly is a very strong contender for this illustrious prize but I wanted to make sure that Rusty was given due consideration. And, of course, Gabe must be considered for a Lifetime Achievement Award.
1 comment:
Loved the label you used to categorize your post.
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