2006 Pufatufnik Awards

2006 Pufatufnik Awards

As my fabulous friend Liz has pointed out, tis the season for award shows. I love award shows just as much as my fabulous friends Liz & Hope. However, I am no longer content to simply vote in other contests (you all didn't know that I have both a SAG card and am a member of the Hollywood Foreign Press - I write for the Denmark Danish). It is for this reason (an many others, including my own boredom) that I call on all my fabulous pufatufnik friends to participate in the nominations and voting for the FIRST ANNUAL PUFATUFNIK AWARDS.

Best wannabe-lame-Pufatufnik-like Performance in a Motion Picture:

This should be awarded to the most wannabe lame Pufatufnik performance - generally not a good thing.

1. Lindsay Lohan - Bobby (didn't see it, but she always plays a crack whore . . . )

2. Jessica Simpson - Dukes of Hazard (dumb crazy in shape crack whore)

3. Jessica Simpson - Employee of the Month (crack whore needing to get her roots done)

4. Sharon Stone - Basic Instinct 2 (deadly crack whore)

Best Liz-like-Pufatufnik Performance in a Motion Picture:

This should be awarded to the most Liz-like Pufatufnik performance - always a great thing.

1. Eva Longoria -The Sentinel (smart crack whore with a gun)

2. Meryl Streep - Devil Wears Prada (sassy crack whore with great clothes)

3. Eva Green - Casino Royale (Bond loving crack whore)

4. Catherine O'Hara - For Your Consideration (Oscar loving crack whore)

Best Hope-like-Pufatufnik Performance in a Motion Picture:
This should be awarded to the most Hope-like Pufatufnik performance -always a great thing.

1. Jennifer Aniston - The Break-up (awesomely funny crack whore)

2. Keira Knightly - POTC: Dead Man's Check (skinny crack whore)

3. Cameron Diaz - The Holiday (spunky crack whore who needs to find a cute British man to date)

4. Sarah Jessica Parker - Failure To Launch (Matthew McConaughey loving crack whore) - this could also be nominated under the "Liz" category.

Best Stephanie-like-Pufatufnik Performance in a Motion Picture:

This should be awarded to the most Stephanie-like Pufatufnik performance - always a great thing.

1. Bryce Dallas Howard - Lady in the Water (crack whore who likes to swim)

2. Elizabeth Mitchell - Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (crack whore who loves Christmas)

3. Moon Bloodgood - Eight Below (Alaskan malamute loving crack whore)

4. Renée Zellweger - Miss Potter (children's book authoring crack whore).

Best Awesome Pufatufnik in a Motion Picture:

This should be awarded to the most awesome Pufatufnik performance - something all of us other pufatufniks aspire to be.

1. Cate Blanchett - The Good German (crack whore who gets to kiss George Clooney)

2. Cate Blanchett - Babel (crack whore who gets to kiss Brad Pitt, but she also gets shot, so weight the pluses and minuses carefully).

3. Angelina Jolie - The Good Shepperd (crack whore who gets to kiss Matt Damon . . . gets to kiss Brad Pitt in real life, too)

4. Kate Beckinsale - Underworld:Evolution (crack whore who gets to kick a lot of ass and kiss Scott Speedman, he's not so bad)

Best Breakout Performance by a Pufatufnik in a Blog:
This should be awarded to the best breakout pufatunik performance in a blog- a wonderful thing.

1. Liz - Nigel Strikes Again - But This Time, A Man (crack whore with crazy animal problems)

2. Hope - Hope Joins the Blog (crack whore with funny thoughts on joining the blog)

3. Stephanie - It's Okay to Sell Gifts on Ebay (crack whore with good advice for selling crap)

Alright, all fellow pufatufniks are invited to add nominees and additional categories. Let the debating begin!