MOLLY, the lazy escape-artist, shoe-eating, smell-storing and dirt-trapping dog. During a lunch of deliciously fried seafood, my fabulous friend Liz and I determined (after heated debate and confirmation from our auditor friends at PriceWaterhouseCoopers) that Molly is the winner of the Worst Dog 2006 Trophy.
All nominees were truly deserving; however, Molly's accomplishments stood alone. During her acceptance speech (howl) Molly thank her fabulous Mom, Stephanie, for being a great example bitch and for teaching her how to go as long as possible without having to take a shower. She also acknowledged the other nominees and applauded their efforts, but then stuck her tongue out, panting. Molly thanked her friends (which is strange because she has none, she bites every other dog she meets) by shaking mud and 20-day old sewage watter on them. Molly left the fake stage, wagging her tail while simultaneously farting.
2 comments:
I laughed so hard when I read this! So funny. Congratulations Molly. Maybe next year you can burn down the house and you will win "Worst Dog of the Decade"
Wagging her tail and farting? That ain't no thang. I do that all the time.
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