Thursday, May 31, 2007

Is Lindsay Lohan An Alcoholic or Just A Fun Loving Scamp?










Recently there has been a lot of media coverage of Lindsay Lohan's (LiLo) most recent drunken car crash. Actually there is pretty much non-stop of media coverage (by coverage, I mean obsession) of Lilo's non-stop partying, drug taking, temper tantrum throwing, drunk driving, screaming fits, public crotch flashing, and generally classy behavior. For the past two nights the "charming", and by "charming" I really mean terrifying, Nancy Grace has dedicated her entire program on Fox to discussing LiLo and her issues.

Ms. Grace isn't the only "journalist" who has devoted a crazy amount of airtime to discussing LiLo and her problems which I think is nuts considering everything else that is going on in the world. I guess with the demise of Anna Nicole the talking heads have to fill that void with another trainwreck and LiLi fits the bill.

Ms. Grace has trotted out various experts who all seem to agree that LiLo has a serious drinking and drug problem. Some of them even think that her behaviour will lead to death if she doesn't immediately get the serious help that only full time rehab can offer. I love the drama and terror that these folks bring to the discussion. My favorite "expert" was the woman from MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) who thinks that LiLo should be charged with attempted murder for driving her car while under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol. Apparently this woman from MADD thinks you can get nominated for an Oscar for Best Dramatic Performance on a News Show. I hope no one tells her that category doesn't exist because then she might tone down her crazy rhetoric which I thought was hillarious.

Here is what I think: most 20-somethings that I knew back when I was in my 20's were drunk every chance they got. I didn't know anyone who did drugs but we all drank like fish at least 4 nights a week. The main differences between us and someone like LiLo were (a) we didn't drink and drive because we lived in a city where you take cabs to get around, (b) the paparazzi didn't follow us around, (c) cell phone cameras hadn't been invented yet (thank god), (d) we had 9-5 jobs instead of jobs where you work for a few months and then get several months off so we had to be sober all day during the week, and (e) we didn't have as much money to buy drinks with as LiLo does.

I don't think LiLo is an alcholic or even a drug addict. I think she is a classless and troubled idiot who should try to wear underpants more often and engage in fewer public fights. Also she might consider some kind of education so that when the media reads and publishes her blackberry messages and excerpts from her MySpace page she won't look like a retarded chimp who types with boxing gloves on. What she really needs is a full time chaperone or maybe a babysitter. Instead she has a mom/pimp who whores her daughter out for the money and fame that it affords her. I would be sympathetic to her if there weren't actual needy people in the world who would kill to have the money an opportunity that this moron wastes every day.

3 comments:

Jonathan said...

One more difference between normal 20 year olds and LiHo: normal 20 year olds are not a role model for zillions of little girls. Remember, most of LiHo's movies are targeted at that audience. Does that mean she should quit partying? Of course not, but she should think about her dumb little fans every once in a while before she does the next line of cocaine.

RV said...

I love the retarded chimp with boxing gloves comment

Liz said...

thanks Ron...I was kind of proud of that comment myself!